I think I got the POINT from this license plate

 

Is that a vanity license plate, or are you just happy to see me?

 Honestly, you can’t make this stuff up.

 Here it is, Monday morning, and I’m off to the local hospital for a medical scan. The doctor’s order calls for IV contrast.

 So, no big deal. I’ve had that a couple dozen times before. 

  I pull into the parking lot, and a grey minivan cuts right in front of me. Just then, I happened to notice the license plate:

### JAB

 The first three were numbers, but it’s probably illegal (or at least unwise) for me to post the whole license number.

  The plate was from another state, which I won’t name, except to say that it rhymes with “will annoy” (Sorry, had to. It’s a border thing.) And I hate to poke fun, but the plate may or may not have been stamped by a former Governor.

 Maybe that’s beside the point.

 

 I just had to wonder whether the minivan belonged to the phlebotomist, nurse, or medical student who would be administering my intravenous hookup.

 As it turned out, the one doing the needlework was most likely a first-timer or a trainee, based on the number of jabs she took to set things up in my arm. (I tried hard to be brave and stoic, as much as it hurt.) Let's just say she's likely to become sharper at it with practice.

 On the bright side, I’m kind of glad it’s a chillier day, so I won’t have to roll my sleeves up for my afternoon conference. The folks I’m meeting could jump to all sorts of conclusions, based on the needle tracks I’m now sporting. But I’m leery of taking a stab at any of that.

 

Image/s: Adapted from public domain artwork

 

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We may leave COVID behind, but what about germaphobia?

 

The coronavirus pandemic has changed us in countless ways. Definitely the tragic deaths and significant sicknesses have left a permanent mark. Every one of us likely lost someone we knew and cared about personally. Most of us either have been sick or loved someone who was. We’ve been quarantined, sheltered-at-home, home-schooled, social distanced, and otherwise felt the crunch of personal and professional restrictions, with the collective hope of containing the dreaded virus.

Now we’re told that the end of these dark days may be coming, even if it’s still months away. But we are beginning to imagine what life may be like in a post-pandemic world.

 

By no means do we want to diminish the pain and losses of the global pandemic of 2020-21.

It’s been truly terrible for so many.

At the same time, it’s human nature to look for silver linings and to find ways to lighten our outlooks on life – even during some of its worst moments.

 

What has the pandemic produced in our lives?

Through the ordeal, we may have gained a few things (besides the “COVID-19,” as our bathroom scales remind us every morning).

• We’ve all become expert hand-washers. And because of that, we can all sing the “Happy Birthday” song in our sleep.
• Each of us has a full array of fashionable face-masks to match everything in our wardrobes, which have been painstakingly whittled down through many hours of reorganizing and lots of discards/donations.
• We still don’t know our neighbors, but we have befriended every dog within a three-block radius of home.
• Many of us have picked up new skills like gardening, handicrafts, bread-making, and home repairs.
• We’ve learned the art of participating in video-conferences with full grooming, but without pants.
• We actually wipe down gym machines before and after using them. (OK, most of us do.)
• We’ve mastered the skill of talking like scientists, even if we barely passed freshman bio.
• We’ve caught up on our lists of TV series to binge.
• We can differentiate between the perils of attending family holiday gatherings and the apparent safety of joining crowded downtown assemblies.
• Each of us is on a first-name basis with the mail carrier, UPS and FedEx drivers, and Amazon delivery guy.
• We can track the best local deals on (and supplies of) paper towels and toilet paper.

 But will any of us ever again:

• press an elevator button with a bare finger?
• taste a pastry sample from the bakery counter?
• stand in line to have gifts wrapped by hand?
• reach into a bowl of bar nuts?
• dab on tester make-up in the cosmetics department?
• eat a birthday cake after someone blows out the candles?
  
• pick up a tiny pizza slice in the freezer department at Costco?
• grab a stair railing (or escalator rail) in a public place?
• pass a hot dog down the row at the ball park?
• drink from a water fountain?
• shake hands with a stranger?

And let’s not even talk about fitting into a pair of jeans.  

Yes, we’ve changed in so many ways. Maybe we’re all germaphobes now.

(You say that like it’s a bad thing?)

Images: Public domain image

 

Feel free to follow Twitter. Find Delightfully Amiss on Facebook. Please visit my Amazon author page as well. And I am happy to share my RUNDERDOG ambassador code for 10% off on Bondi Band Athletic Headbands, Accessories, and Fashions. (Simply enter the code at online checkout.).